Tamara Graham faced the pangs that many working mothers do: leaving her toddler child for an extended time to do her job.
But Graham, whose daughter was 2 at the time, traveled thousands of miles away in 2011 as a soon-to-be-retired naval helicopter pilot and leader.
“Now here I am in a landing zone, helping people who literally lost everything in a tsunami,” she said of her duty aboard the USS Ronald Reagan during Operation Tomodachi off Japan following the Tōhoku earthquake. “And [my tot was] at home with a dad who loves her and is well cared for. And because of the things that I do in the Navy, we’re able to help these people.”
The ship moved over 100 tons of food, water, blankets, clothing and medical supplies to Japanese in need.
Today, she would be “more than happy” if her teen daughter joins the military at some point.
Graham was the keynote speaker Sunday at the Memorial Day observance at Miramar National Cemetery. Her speech honored 50 years of women serving in naval aviation.
“Today, female naval aviators project power from the sea and every type model series of aircraft the Navy flies,” she said. “As critical members of our joint force around the globe, they fly and fight strike missions on submarines, protect the integrity of our nuclear triad, supply essential cargo and rescue those in distress at sea and ashore.”
As well, women command aircraft carriers, carrier air wings, squadrons and even missions to space, Graham said.
“It’s been an incredible 50 years,” said the former helicopter pilot.
Soon to join civilian life, Graham says she wouldn’t change anything about her 30 years in the Navy.
“I have had a very blessed career with phenomenal people everywhere I’ve gone,” she said after the ceremony. “It’s been awesome.”
Graham has seen many changes in military policy.
“In the last 30 years, military women have played critical roles in every operation in theater around the globe, working and leading alongside their male counterparts, ensuring our national security,” she said.
‘No Limitations’
“There are no limitations to military service today, and the timing couldn’t be better given the challenges we face,” she added.
Graham’s accomplishments are impressive.
Graham, a graduate of the Naval War College where she received her master’s degree in National Security Studies, has more than 3,000 flight hours.
Her awards and decorations include the Legion of Merit, Defense Meritorious Service Medal, Meritorious Service Medal, two Air Medals (Strike/Flight), four Navy and Marine Corps Commendation Medals, two Navy and Maine Corps commendation medals, and various campaign decorations.
Graham was born in Rome, New York, and was designated a naval aviator in February 1996. She deployed on the USS Kitty Hawk in 1996 and USS Carl Vinson in 1998. She was the 1999 HS-6 Pilot of the Year.
In Operation Iraqi Freedom, she flew more than 40 combat sorties.
She took command of the legendary Black Knights in October 2011. In 2016, Graham was assigned as vice president and chief of staff for the U.S. Naval War College in Newport, Rhode Island, and as force requirements director in 2019.
Flying was on Graham’s radar since the first time she stepped aboard an airplane.
“I loved the idea of flying. It’s an incredible … very dynamic, physical environment,” she said in an interview.
Disguised as Man in 1776
Women have served and died in the nation’s wars since the American Revolution, Graham recalled to about 250 attendees at the Memorial Day observance.
Margaret Corbin disguised herself as a man in 1776 and fought alongside her husband at the Battle of Fort Washington, loading cannons and, after her husband had fallen, taking gunshot fire.
Corbin continuing to fight, Graham pointed out.
Clara Barton, founder of the Red Cross, served as a nurse in the Civil War.
“But even as women continued to serve and even lose their lives through Korea and Vietnam, their roles were constrained and relegated to what society at the time considered women’s work,” said the San Diegan.
“Armed Forces have always been a reflection of society. So as society has changed, so did the military,” Graham said.
Then in 1972, facing retention and recruitment issues, Adm. Elmo Zumwalt signed an order establishing greater equality for naval personnel, “opening up numerous rates and specialties to women,” she said.
In March 1973, the first group of women began U.S. naval flight training in Pensacola, Florida. The following year, that group earn its wings. They would go on to fly transports, helicopters, hurricane hunters and eventually jet aircraft.
Yet despite their accomplishments, these women were constrained by policies that limited where they could go and what they could do.
“It’s difficult to be a productive and competitive naval aviator when you’re not even allowed aboard a ship or to deploy,” Graham said about the limitations at the time. “So they set about to change the rules.”
The former military policies and institutions were “at odds with our principles and our values,” she said.
End to Combat Ban
The women-in-combat exclusion policy ended in April 1993 opening both Navy combat vessels and aircraft to women for the first time, 20 years after women first began flight training.
Luckily, Graham was commissioned a month after the combat ban was lifted.
“I just was very lucky that the women who had gone before me had not only endured and succeeded, but then they looked around and said: ‘There’s more that needs to be done in order for us to serve completely and to be able to compete and lead,’” she said.
Now she is looking toward those who will take her place in the military.
“I’d like the message to get out more as to what opportunities exist in the military,” she said.” I still find that you go to too many places where someone goes, ‘Oh, I didn’t know a girl could fly.’ It just amazes me.”
“There’s not a real understanding of the skill, the education, the benefits that you can get as a member of the U.S. military,” she continued. “And I think there’s too few that serve to be able to share that knowledge.”
Graham said that when she began in the service, she never imagined how much she would succeed.
After leaving the military, she will explore the aerospace industry or leadership development in a non-military environment, she said.
Other than excellent critical thinking skills, pilots need good eye-hand coordination and have a passion for doing it.
“No one gender is better than the other in the grand scheme of things,” she said — but offered that women are known to be good multitaskers.
